kh wrote:
> Apologies if this gets posted twice, I'm having some problems in
> google today.
>
> I have a question regarding the appropriate close in an email, with
> two particular situations in mind.
>
> One is with someone I met about a year ago and with whom I have
> maintained an email correspondence, and to whose home have been
> invited next time I visit France. Til now, we have corresponded in
> English, and our emails ended in "Best Regards", but we recently
> switched to writing in French. Her last email to me ended with
> "Bises." I have always been under the impression that "bises" is
> reserved for family members and very close and long-term friends.
>
> In the other situation, I received an email from the sister (whom I
> have not yet met) of my boyfriend, and her email was signed "Je
> t'embrasse". Again, I thought this was reserved for family/lovers/
> very long-term friends.
No, not at all in most circles. It is just friendly. 'La bise' ithe
famous two (or more) kisses on the cheeks that the French do, though
they are rarely kisses as such, though can be, just a light touch of the
cheeks more or less. 'Bisous', which is also put on the bottom of
messages, is a little more like our 'kisses' in English and does imply
family members or good friends.
> The whole formal/informal, "tu"/"vous" concept confuses me. My French
> tutor has told me that one NEVER uses "tu" or gets too familiar or
> friendly ever, unless one is explicitly asked to use "tu", and that
> people frequently know each other for years without ever moving to
> "tu". Yet everyone I have met in a social context and corresponded
> with has immediately used "tu" with me right away. I'm hesitant to
> use "tu" back, or the friendlier email closings, because I fear
> offending someone.
Unless the person is far older than you and you are still very young, so
a good age difference, if someone uses 'tu' to you then you can and
should use it back. If you mistakenly 'tutoie' someone when they
'vouvoie' you, don't worry too much about it, people understand and most
would simply put it down to you lack of knowkedge of their language and
customs.
> Any suggestions/advice appreciated -- I'm delaying my replies to
> emails because I'm not sure of the appropriate closings. :)
If he/she is tutoieing you then you should do it back, otherwise you
will appear to be standoffish, trying to keep your distance.
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