My God, man, you may just be onto something!
Quick, send this to the San Francisco Chronicle!
<gcook888@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> wrote in message
news:ee64b57a-75dd-40fe-981b-87547a2454b1@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> DRAFT - version 1.0
>
> Working Title= "He does not wor****p the devil on friday Nites (what
> does this actually mean?)"
> OR
> (HDNWTDOFNWDTAM)
>
> 1. Guy has no apparent problems and is VERY responsible. Has a TOP
> SECRET CLEARANCE working DOD contract up north somewhere...
> Set current day with teletype across screen like the "X-Files"
> Has a nice little apartment. Watches MTV 'Remote control' after work
> on TV
> (although this show hasnt been on since the 80's really) [WHY CAN HE
> PICK THAT SHOW UP?]
>
> 2. Buys 2 brown gerbils that cost $250/ a piece and the 'Habitrail'
> clear plastic
> containment facility for $1000. The 'Habitrail' has a wheel and a
> tube leading up to a small
> apartment so the gerbils can go up there. (INSERT REASON THEY ARE SO
> EXPENSIVE)<-
> (DOESNT HE CALL AROUND TO SEE IF THEY ARE CHEAPER SOMEWHERE ELSE?)-for
> some reason no?
>
> Fig 1-Habitrail looks like an aquarium with a tube leading up to a
> penthouse with a wheel in it
> and a water bottle
>
> 3. Gerbils try to escape from moment 1. They make a lot of noise
> trying to gnaw their way out thru the wire
> mesh that is their floor.
> They havent bit the guy yet.
>
> 4. Guy has a nice little vial of liquid lsd that is labeled 'Liquid
> LSD'
>
> 5. He has been taking it on Fridays and going to a strip joint.
> Thats SIMPLY what he does on friday nights.
> he does NOT wor****p the devil on friday nights. he does not go to
> church on sundays.
>
> 6. Since he cant sleep because of gerbils NOISE he 1st tries dosing
> them thru their water bottle WITH ALCOHOL (VODKA)
> they get drunk ONCE (IDEA->how do i know they are drunk?IS IT SOME WAY
> THEY USE THE WHEEL?)
> then tHEY JUST stop drinking water tainted with vodka. And he tries
> putting them in a closet.
> STILL TOO MUCH NOISE OF THEM
> They would rather get out. they have formulated clear plans to kill
> me by biting on my artery)
>
> 7. Then he tries by buying them a new "friend" white one.
>
> 8. This will also make the 'Habitrail' containment facility more
> colorful like a tropical fish aquarium
> which is not an option because AQUARIUMS NOT ALLOWED BY APARTMENT.
>
> 9. On saturday Goes to pet store to get it. Employee has a PETA badge
> on his body where his TOP SECRET
> Clearance button should go.
>
> 10. Pet Store employee Advises that white one and brown ones WILL GET
> ALONG GREAT.
>
> 11. White one costed $300.
>
> 12. When white one is placed in 'Habitrail' the brown ones chase him
> up to the
> penthouse up that tube and start eating him (on his skull) right away.
>
> 13. Yes 'Going for the One' is on =soundtrack. (Progressive Rock)
>
> 14. Guy SAVES white one USING RELIGION and QUICKNESS returns it to
> store on Monday and the GAY employee says he saw guy at strip
> joint past Friday. Guy hates that.
> I actually went to 3 different strip joints that nite.
>
> 15. So now I know these gerbils ARE MEAN. Now starts the biting
> every time I get them out.
> They run up to me and bite me even when i give them free domain IN THE
> APARTMENT like the CIA has.
>
> 16. So I start drinking. There is NO DRINKING ALLOWED AT THE
> APARTMENT so I do it in the woods
> at a place that is nearby between here and the convenience store.
>
> 17. Go back to pet store buy CLEAR PLASTIC BALLS slightly smaller
> than a volleyball and bigger than a tennis ball
> with little air holes
> to put gerbils in
> so i can take them outside safely (without escapes) and they roll
> around in them on the tennis court.
>
>
> 18. I do not like that pet store clerk who charges me 2000/ea for the
> balls. His advice NOW
> is DONT PLAY TENNIS withem gerbils in the balls.
>
> 19.Feral cat walks up and python crawls up to watch as I GENTLY kick
> the gerbils to get them started moving in their
> balls on the tennis court.
>
> 20. i thinks this would make a good play. I like this s**** and that
> cat better than these "rats"
>
> 21. Or a movie. "shop story around"
>
> 22. Guy starts posting to internet newsgroups (ng's) as a "troll" (a
> troll can collect emotions by angering a serious person )
> to test his movie therories out. If
> they react strongly this makes a good movie.
>
> Also raises pinkFloyd/Confederate Flag issue. The groups he posts to
> are alt.witchcraft,alt.music.pink-
> floyd,alt.thinking.hurts,alt.drunken.bastards,and alt.slack(the fbi
> undercover ng),
> and alt.drugs.hard, alt.dissolved-reality.
> .
> What a teenager.!! This man was once a GREAT teenager.
>
> 23. Gerbils continue every nite Very Noise try to get out. They PRAY
> (subtitles, or "maybe they are narrarating this whole thing"
> No sleep. Drinking INCREASES.
>
> 24. Throw gerbils out in the snow from 2nd story bathroom window.
> Alas, throw self out in snow thru same window.
> Bring gerbils back in apartment to 'Habitrail' being
> still MORTALLY WOUNDED by bites across wrists. Call 911. Christy
> probably has dosed me.
>
> 25. take lsd-25 and PRAY about them being "out there in the snow no
> direction home like a rolling stone".
>
> 26. Now its spring. Not much sleep during the winter. still made
> strip joint appointments on liquid A every
> TGIF during \winter. holding a gerbil around throat cant bring them
> into strip joint that is called
> "The Bottom Line". denied entry with hand on throat of gerbil.
>
> 27. Now feed gerbils to the feral cat AND s****(s). These gerbils
> ARE evil but thats not why.
> He likes watching 2 things in action. Strippers AND feral cats. They
> have " POLE-CATS" up in maine that
> are cross of regular cat and racoons.
>
> Buy more gerbils on a SAVINGS PLAN similar to that that a person gets
> for feeding his
> s****s. The discount is only down to $175/ea. I hate this pet store
> clerk with no apparent claearance for anything but PETA.
> But I LOVE the s**** and the feral cat so much.
>
> 28. This is pretty good. Kick NEW gerbils around on tennis court and
> feed cat and s**** after they are done with their
> "rolling around vacations". GAY pet store guy gets MY knife to the
> heart after work one nite.
>
> 29. Now the drinking problem is solved doesnt drink can sleep at
> night etc
>
> 30. But the RESURRECTED GAY PETA employee comes over to beat the guy
> up about what he's doing. and jealously
>
> 31. Catches him on the tennis court doing his thing and beats him in
> a fist fight. Gay PETA homo***ual wins the fist fight
>
> 32. So this girl shoots him USING A SCOPE from her apartment looking
> out over the tennis court
>
> 33. She walks down to the tennis court with 2 brown gerbilS (NON-
> BITING) in her left hand and a white one
> in her right hand hand. Me and HER put them in the
> 2 CLEAR PLASTIC GERBIL balls i have AND 1 (clear plastic ball) WE FIND
> IN THE WOODS behind the tennis court
>
> 34. We play tennis with the three of a perfect pair gerbils in the
> CLEAR PLASTIC BALLS.
> SoundTrack= 3 of a perfect 2 by king crimson. (progressive rock)
>
> 35.cat and s**** walk up. Watch, wait...I have *** with both of them
> because they aren't used to the gerbils not coming.
> Cats are better for *** than s****s
>
>
> 36. Now its a ROMANCE BETWEEN the guy and AND her. SOUNDTRACK
> ="Carry on my Wayward Son"-By Kansas!
>
> 37. I tear my ACL (anterior cruciate ligament) playing tennis with
> this heroic girl/.
>
> 38. She advises read the scientoology "Dianetics" book BY lron
> hubbard. before surgery
>
> 39. I cant quite get that done in time.
>
> 40. I SAY things in the OR (OPERATING ROOM) that are siritual and a
> little sinister. basically i can get the nurses to laugh
> EVEN
> WHEN I HAVE TAKEN TRUTH SERUM.
>
> 41. The cast for a torn ACL is a right angle on your entire leg. I
> go to a Kansas concert with eric but i'm out of "Liquid A".
> He has "tetragrammaton" blotter PAPER LSD. It started working in 45
> minutes really good.
>
> 42. I get to Kansas backstage on crutches with eric. i had to
> actually run with my cast on. tHAT MEANS go fast on crutches.
> we kNEW WHEN THE STAGE DOOR WAS GOING TO BE OPEN and we had to hurry.
>
> Kansas is great. (think of wizard of oz ... i want the movie to play
> "Carry on my Wayward Son"-By Kansas! again.TWICE
> CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW GROUNDBREAking this is. nO?
>
> 43. It turns out he misinterpreted Carlos Castenada (THE yAQUI iNDIAN
> sorcerer) to spy on my enemies with a lizard with its
> lips sewn shut. So I sewed my own lips shut wondering where gay
> homo***ual PETA. The lizard comes back. The LIZARD says (subtitles)
> where HIS homo***ual switchblade is and i collect it.
>
> 44. CURRENT Gerbils PRAY to get out.
>
> 45. So now they a decent attitude and just PRAY w/o physically
> assaulting their environment.
> Some how they know (Heredity?) NOW if they're bad they get a brief
> little rat vacation
> before and THINK its going to be "perhaps i'll just hang them" IF they
> try to escape. So no more killing.
> They understand english and i hate bringning these GOOD gerbils down
> from their plane.
>
>
> EXTRA extra EXTRA
> 47. These GERBIL ENCASING CLEAR -PLASTIC balls even glow in the dark.
>
> 48.More about the Central Character to put in this Movie:
> (b) CIA came to see him at strip joint. TOLD him to stop EVERYTHING.
> he Does not take THEIR word for anything.
> doesnt trust them.
> (a) Picks up a hitchiker on the way to a party. The hitchiker has a
> plastic gun that shoots disappearing ink colored water.
> He takes it away,
> takes it party and squirts girls that cry thinking their sweater is
> ruined.
> and thus makes friends with it.
> (c) watches "Remote Control" on mTV after work in love with Marisol
> Massey and sends stuff in E-mail to her
> (d) HOMoNYM PROBLEMS= such that went to emergency room for help with
> "homonyms" Basically apparently English language is
> overflowing with them to the point he's interpreting the same sentance
> 4or5 different ways .
>
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